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Saying Yes a Little More Often

By Alona · Alona, I founder and CEO behind Spark (My Founders) and Zai. Welcome. Please reach out if you have any questions or suggestions. We thank you for being here! · · 3 min read

A reflection on happiness, everyday experiences, and the small choice to say yes more often.

Lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about happiness.
Not in the big, dramatic sense of “What is the meaning of life?” but in a much simpler way: what actually makes a normal week feel like a good week?
And I’m starting to think that maybe part of my own journey toward being happier is simply learning to say yes more often. I am often on the "No" side of converstions but I think I want to change it or at least try to change it.
Last weekend, I played beach volleyball. Today, I went for a hike. And now I’m already thinking about what else I can do next.
None of these things are life-changing on their own. I didn’t come back from volleyball as a completely different person. The hike didn’t solve any of my problems.
A hike in TO
A hike in TO
But I noticed something.
When I’m doing something — when I’m outside, moving, meeting people, trying something new, going somewhere — I feel happier. Even when I do not want to go to an event and even if I thin it sucks, I am actually happier when I attend and meet people and turns out it is not as bad after all.
And maybe happiness is built from more moments like that. From more Yes moments.
I think sometimes I wait for a reason to do something.
  • Do I really want to go?
  • Do I know the people?
  • Am I good at it?
  • Is it worth the drive?
  • Do I have time?
  • Do I look pretty ( yes I ask that question)
  • Maybe I’ll do it next weekend.
And suddenly, it becomes very easy to stay home and do nothing.
Staying home
Staying home
So I’m wondering what would happen if I changed the question. @Do Positive Psychology Exercises Actually Work?
Instead of asking, “Why should I do this?” maybe I should ask, “Why not?” ( That's a good one)
  • Someone asks me to play volleyball? Yes.
  • There’s a hike I haven’t done? Go.
  • An event looks interesting? Try it. Why Not?
  • Someone invites me somewhere and my first reaction is, “Eh, maybe”? Maybe that is exactly when I should say yes.
Not yes to everything, obviously. @Visit Every U.S. National Park
  • Yes to more experiences.
  • Yes to being outside.
  • Yes to people.
  • Yes to movement.
  • Yes to places I haven’t been.
  • Yes to things I might not be very good at.
  • Yes to doing something just because it sounds fun.
Maybe happiness isn’t always something you find by thinking harder about happiness. Maybe sometimes you have to give happiness more opportunities to find you.
And the more I think about it, the happiest version of my life probably isn’t the one where everything is perfectly planned and comfortable.
It’s probably the one where I have more stories.
So maybe this is part of my experiment now: say yes a little more often and see where life takes me.

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